a missing history
by sweetytaylor16
Summary: Raven goes missing, a new girl Named Razzi catches the attention of the Titans. Who's the kid? Who's the dad? And could she be the missing Raven?
1. Chapter 1

Prologue

Cyborg's p.o.v.

The last thing we ever found from Raven was a letter it was for Beast boy and he was the only one who could get up the nerve to go into her room after she disappeared, we spent many months looking for her but never found her. BB hasn't been normal since then, he's been very depressed and spent most of his time in his room. I took a lot of time to myself after she disappeared too she was like my younger sister and I worry about her myself every day, wondering where she is, if she's happy and healthy or if she is even still in this world. Her home was a place called azarath and she would often call it hell. BB and I knew more about her then any of the other's because we have been into her mind. It was not a nice place especially when her father took control that was a mess. She joined with all her emotions and became a white Raven, she fought her father and won the battle.


	2. a missing friend

Chapter 1 a missing friend.

BB's p.o.v.

I remember that day well:

I walked into her room to find she wasn't there. Her presence not being there was ripping my heart apart. a plain white envelope caught my attion. I picked it up and opened it.

Dear Beast boy,

I know it's you because you would be the one with enough courage to enter my room after what I did. I know you must hate me now. I need you to know how I felt about you. Beast boy I loved you like you were my soul, but you have to understand that I couldn't take it anymore thinking, believing, knowing you can't love me.

I cried for hours and thought that if only she had known for sure how I felt about her, she wouldn't have disappeared. We never saw her again. We all had to go on with our lives, Starfire and Robin got together, Cyborg went to find a way to get over losing the girl he thought of as his younger sister, He found someone to love. He found Missy who is a lot like him, she likes the same things as he does she even helps him to build new T-cars and communicators and other things that the teen titans might need.

Razzi P.o.v.

I don't know who I was up until 3 years ago. 3 years ago I was in the hospital and told that I had long term memory lose of what had happened before, I didn't even know my own name. Being that the hospital went through the state to give me a new name it's Razzi. They said I reminded them of someone who could razzle dazzle people. So now everyone calls me Razzi. I also found out that I was pregnant that day. I have a 2 year old girl named Lighann since I didn't have a last name either the hospital gave me the last name Logan so that's my daughters as well Lighann maire Logan. She has purple hair with green tips, and bright shining green eyes with flecks of purple and blood red in them.

"Mommy!"

"Lighann, hush hunny it's okay mommy's here." I say as I hold my little girl in my arms and stroke her hair softly. She has bad dreams often, I don't know why she does the pediatricians don't know either they seem to think it might just be because she's so young and doesn't know where she is. We just moved into a new house in a place called Jump city. I know that this city is protected by a group of teens not much older then me who are called the teen titans, and I know they live in a tower shaped like a T. The only reason I know those things is because I looked up information on the city when I moved into it. I rocked her back and forth on my lap until she fell asleep and then I put her back in her crib and I went back to my bed and lay down.

* Dream

"Beast boy!" a girl in blue yelled out as a green boy fell from a roof, then she calmed herself down as he turned into a bird and flew back up to her. He landed on the roof and transformed into a kitten then rubbed up against her leg. The girl smiled a little before she heard a glass break. Her smile faded.

He transformed into his human self, his green hair spiked up as normal and his green eyes sparkling like everything. He pulled her close and kissed her. She could taste it in his breath he was drunk but then she knew she was too, there friend cyborg had bought beer and wine to celebrate Starfire's 5 year anniversary on earth as well as her 18th birthday. He pulled his jacket off , lay it down on the roof and pulled her down on to it. He ran his hands up and down her sides then removed her cloak. The next morning she woke up and found that he was gone and she cried herself to sleep again. She wrote a note and left... *

"AHHHHHHHHHHH!" I woke with a scream, and felt my self sweating from head to toe. I closed my eyes and leaned back against my pillows. It wasn't the first time I'd had a dream like that but I was no closer to understanding it now then I had been before, In fact I fell less understanding of it.

"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" I hear Lighann crying again so I get up and pick her up.

"Go to sleep, go to sleep, my little baby sleep in the night while god watches you, sleep and dream of all the things you want, sleep and dream of your Christmas, and your delights. " I sang to her in a soft voice. I sang for a while until she fell asleep once more then I put her back in her crib with a soft green blanket and a little kitten toy that she loved, she would put her arms around it and hold it close to her, almost as if she was one.

I went back to my room and turned on the t.v., the news came on and the first thing I saw was three of the four remaining teen titans, they were talking about how they couldn't find their old friend, she had apparently been missing for about as long as I had been with out my own memories part of me wondered if she was me or how ever you want to look at it. I listened to them for a while then tuned them out as my eyes began to get heavy at 1 in the morning I closed my eyes for the night.

BB's p.o.v.

I can't stop thinking about Raven we were 17 when she disappeared. Her hair was getting long again. I don't remember much about the night before she disappeared I heard from the others that we both had gotten drunk after star's birthday party, but I didn't know what happened.

We looked through all the papers in the cities files and there was no evidence of Raven any where, there was a file on a girl who had just moved to the city her name was Razzi and she was 19 with a two year old daughter, it said her last name was Logan it made me wonder where she was from. We gave up searching for Raven when we found her cloak in an ally with blood on the ground right by it, everyone figured she had been killed. My heart had fallen about a hundred feet when we found that cloak. Yesterday we had a memorial service for her and placed a grave marker by Tearra's stone self for her as well. Tearra died protecting us in the end and Raven we figure died trying to protect herself.

"Beast boy, may I enter?" came Starfire's voice.

"Sure Star." I said very softly as she opened the door.

"Friend Beast boy will you not come out of your room of sleep and join us in the room of living? we wish to watch old video's." she said as she litely put her hand on my arm.

"I guess, I'll be down in a minute, Star." I said as I got up. I heard her foot steps on the floor as she walked away my eyes began to run over with tears of hurt, I wiped them off pulled up one of Ravens cloaks and pulled it around me, then walked to the living room.

"Hey BB, you want some pop corn? " came Cy's voice from the kitchen.

"Sure." I said to him.

"Want some mustard?" Star asked very sweetly.

"Umm, no thanks Star, not my thing." I shake my head with a small smile on my face. I get up and go to the frig to get some soy milk. I pour it into a cup and then walk to the sofa again. Cy, Star and I sat down while Robin puts in a tape then he sits down and puts an arm around Star who leaned against him.

The picture changes to the beach out side of the tower and there sitting on the rocks is Raven her hair hidden under her hood as always, reading a book.

"Rae!" on screen Bb called out.

"Don't call me Rae!" She snapped at me.

"Come on, get in it's fun." I called out.

"No Beast boy, I don't do water." she said

"Please friend Raven." asked Starfire.

"Star.." Raven said her name.

We could see Cy and Robin sneaking up behind her and putting their fingers to their lips. Starfire pouted at Raven who just pushed her hood off and shrugged. Cy and Robin picked her up and threw her into the water so fast that she didn't know what had happened. You could hear her scream at them before the scene went black.

The picture came back on and Robin, Star and Cy were all sitting next to the radio listening to the newest song by Maroon five. Raven was sitting in a chair with a book in her lap reading, it wasn't just any book though it was a romance novel and she looked very into it. I came out of the kitchen with a glass of soy milk in it and a cup of herbal tea. I gave the cup of herbal tea to Raven who looked up and smiled at me slightly then pulled my hand into her's and she kissed me lightly on the cheek as a thank you.

"I'm going to go get something to celebrate Star's birthday and her 5th year on earth." Cy said as he walked out of the room.

About an hour later he came back. We all sat down and drank while we were talking. Raven walked up to the roof and I followed then it showed Star and Robin kissing, and Cy laughing as he beat his own high score on mega monkeys 3.

I pulled her cloak around me tighter and smelled it, it smelled like violets her favorite flower. I had gone through a lot of trouble to find the perfume she would always wear which she never admitted to. I closed my eyes as I heard her voice from the T.V. "Beast boy, how dare you.." I knew then the last thing was another tape the one where she had found me with her dairy before I had even opened it. I fell asleep on the couch with her cloak wrapped around me.


	3. I'm raven?

Chapter 2 I'm Raven.

Razz's p.o.v.

BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ! Was the sound I heard as my alarm went off. I sat up and turned off the alarn then got up an dressed for the day in a long black skirt and deep purple velvet long sleeve shirt with a necklace that had a cat charm on it. For some reason the cat makes me feel safe and apparently it also made my daughter happy. I got her out of the crib and put her in a dress that was blue and put a little green bow in her hair. Then I left for work taking my daughter to the daycare center.

"Bye bye sweety, I'll see you later." I called as I walked out the door, she was playing with another little girl named Marris.

I walked down to the book store where I worked and went in.

"Hey Razzi" said the blond haired boy named Robby who I worked with.

"Hey Robby." I say as I walk around to the back of the counter.

"Where's the little one?" asks my boss. I get a look from Robby and just turn to the boss.

"She's at daycare until I get off work." I say.

"Oh. I haven't seen Leighann for quite a while." she said

"Leighann hasn't been sleeping all that great, neither have I, I didn't get to sleep for good until 1 this morning ." I said.

"Oh I'm sorry. If you want you can have the day off." she said.

"No, I can't. I need the money." I tell her.

"Razzi you need to rest and make sure your in good health for that little girl of yours." she said as she walked off.

"You have a daughter Razzi?" Robby asked

"Yes, her name is Leighann she's 2 years old." Razzi said.

"I bet she looks like you." he said

I blushed a bit then shook my head, "I don't know. She has purple hair like mine was before I dyed it but she has green tips and her eyes are green with purple and blood red specks in them. I don't know who her father is but that's because of my memory loss. I know nothing of before the day I found out I was pregnant with her and that was 3 years ago."

"I'm sorry you don't know who you were before but you seem to have a pretty good life now." he said

I turned back to the front of the store as the bell above the door rand and in stepped a red haired girl who was holding hands with a black haired boy who had on a mask. I heard Robby inhale fast and looked bact at him, he just stared at them.

"How may I help you?" I asked them. The girl looked at me and stopped her eyes looked as though she had seen a ghost.

"Raven!" she screamed as she pulled me over the counter and hugged me so tightly I thought I was going to suffocate before the boy pulled her away from me.

"I'm so sorry it's just you look so much like our lost friend. She must have thought you were her."

"My name is Razz." I said to them "I don't know who this Raven girl is but I have heard about her. Did she have purple hair?" I asked as I held my breath.

"Yes." came another voice I looked up and found my eyes meeting those of Cyborg.

"Your Cyborg." I said "I've seen you guys on tv before."

"Why did you ask about her hair?" asked Starfire.

"Well I don't know anything about my life up until 3 years ago, memory loss, and people used to tell me I looked like her before I dyed my hair it used to be purple." I said

"Wow." said Cy. "You know guys we never did find Rae."

The name struck me deep inside.

"Don't call me that!" I said surprising myself and the others.

"What the heck!" yelled Robin then he pulled my hair up and there on my forehead was a little red stone that was glowing.

"You really are friend Raven!" Starfire said as she pulled me close again.

When I got free of her I turned to Robby. "Tell the boss I went home." and I ran from the store with them on my tail.

I got to the day care and picked up my little girl, I had just got to my house when I heard Cy's voice calling to me I turned around and stared at him. I didn't know why but I believed them that I was this Raven girl, but I still didn't know who Leighann's father was.

"Mommy." Leighann cried to me. As the others caught up to me.

"Did that little girl just call you mommy!" screamed Cy.

"Yes, this is my daughter, Leighann she's two and your scaring her." I said as I lightly ran my hand through her hair. "Sh sh, it's okay baby your safe mommy isn't going to let anyone hurt you."

"What's your new name." Robin asked

"My name is Razzi Logan it was given to me by the state when it was found that I had know memories. My daughters name is Leighann Marie Logan." I said

"Would you please come and stay with us for a while see if maybe some of those memories can come back." Cy asked me.

" I don't know, leighann has trouble sleeping as it is, and I haven't been getting to sleep until late myself." I said

"Friend Beast boy would be very happy to see you." Star said.

"Who?" I asked

"Beast boy, our green friend." she said " the one that used to bother you."

"He hasn't been the same since the day you disappeared, we thought you where dead we couldn't find you anywhere." Cy said

"Come stay with us for Christmas it's just a day away come stay in your old room, bring your daughter." Robin said

"If I come will you show me things to help me remember." I ask

"Of crouse." Cy said

"I need to get our stuff if you want to you can come in, it will take me just a few minutes" I said as I opened the door and walked in. I put Leighann in her crib and began to pack up a suitcase with my chlose and hers. It took me ten minutes. When I came back out into the living room where her crib was she was in Stars arms laughing at the strange words she was saying.

"Well I'm ready I have all of our stuff." I take Leighann into my arms and smile down at her as she smiles at me. She looks at Cy and then at her crib where her kitten toy was sitting and starts crying. "Oh baby, it's okay."

"This what you want little one?" Cy asked as he handed her the little toy. She smiled at him and wrapped her around the toy.

"Thank you." I said to him.


	4. Who are you?

Chapter 3 who are you.

BB's p.o.v.

When I woke up in the living room, I noticed it was really quiet, looking around I saw that Robin and Star where sitting in the kitchen talking softly to each other as they ate toast and drank, an Cy was staring out the windows. He hadn't been the same since Raven had disappeared either, he had stopped playing video games and he wouldn't watch the movies like he used to with us. It was no secret to any of us that he thought of Raven as his younger sister, hell he thought of all of us as his younger siblings because he was the oldest out of all of us.

He had taken it just as hard if not harder then I had, when she disappeared. I don't know when I fell in love with Raven maybe when I first meet her or later on when we had gone through so much together. We never found any sign of Raven but we did find her cloak in an ally way it had blood on it like she had been in a fight but we eventually had to give up on looking., I had found nothing but the names of the a few girls who had moved into the city around the same time she had disappeared but that didn't mean anything either.

"Cy!" I sat up straight when I heard the new voice and watched as Cy turned around smiling and walked off.

"Oh good morning, Friend Beast Boy." Starfire said when she noticed me.

I waved at her and headed toward my room to go change, on my way there I stopped, Cy was standing in front of Raven's room with a girl who had black hair and was holding a little girl with purple hair with green tips and talking about the things that we had done with Raven. The little girl reached her arms out and stared at Cy with big eyes before he took her into his arms and then she snuggled into his shoulder.

"She's cute." Cy said to Razzi

"I know I wish I remembered who her father is." she said "but heck I don't even know my past."

"Well you will." Cy said

I turned into a fly just before Robin and Starfire walked into the hall way, I watched as Star hugged this strange girl and then took the baby into her arms as well.

"Your so cute." she said as she ran her hand through the girls hair.

I turned back into my self and walked out into the hall way and the older girl looked at me, her eyes those eyes were just like Ravens they were the same purple color and gave me shivers through my body.

"You must be Beast boy." she said looking at me.

"That's me. Who are you?" I asked the girl.

"My name is Razzi." she said "this is my little girl Leighann." She said indicating the little girl in Stars arms.

"What are you doing here?:" I asked her.

"Umm..." she looked at Cy and the others.

"She's here because we were hoping it would help her get her memories back." Cy said

"Her memories ?" I asked

"She has know memory of before 3 years ago." Robin said

"Hey!" she yelled "I'm capable of talking myself you know!"

"Sorry." they all said

"You sound like Rae." I said a dark look in my eyes.

"Don't call me Rae!" she yelled at me.

"What!" I said

"We believe she is friend Raven, and she believes it too." Starfire said

Looking at the girl I could see she looked just like Raven except for her hair color.

"You dyed your hair." I said as a matter of fact.

"Yes." She answered

I turned into a cat and brushed against her leg smelling the sent of Raven. I looked up and the little girl keep trying to get down so Star set her down on the floor she looked at me and then she turned herself in to a little purple and green kitten with striking green eyes with purple and blood red in them. The girl I knew now was Raven picked up the little kitten just as it turned back into the girl. Only one other person could do that. Me. I turned back in to myself just as my memories came back to me.

"Beast boy!" a girl in blue yelled out as a green boy fell from a roof, then she calmed herself down as he turned into a bird and flew back up to her. He landed on the roof and transformed into a kitten then rubbed up against her leg. The girl smiled a little before she heard a glass break. Her smile faded.

He transformed into his human self, his green hair spiked up as normal and his green eyes sparkling like everything. He pulled her close and kissed her. She could taste it in his breath he was drunk but then she knew she was too, there friend cyborg had bought beer and wine to celebrate Starfire's 5 year anniversary on earth as well as her 18th birthday. He pulled his jacket off , lay it down on the roof and pulled her down on to it. He ran his hands up and down her sides then removed her cloak... *

"Wait just a minute." Robin exclaimed "Your daughter can change into animals ?"

"It seems so." Razzi said

I stared at the girl in front of me and then I took the little girl in my arms she snuggled close to me before almost meowing out the one word I was afraid of.

"Daddy..." Leighann smiled and then gently faded into sleep.

"So I'm a father." I said more to myself then the others but I noticed the gapping looks as I handed the beautiful little girl back to her mother.

"I wish I could remember." Was all she said before locking herself in her room like she had before.

"BB?" Cy asked "When did you and Raven..."

"Star's birthday." I answered him. "We were drunk, and I wanted her to know how I felt."

"How you felt?" Cy asked confused.

"Friend Cyborg, is it not obvious that friends Beast boy and Raven loved each other?" Star said

That was when I knew, even though she had been gone for 3 years I still loved the girl in that room. The girl who had once worn nothing but her leotard and cape, the girl who made me think of nothing but how she made me fell. Star was right we had loved each other, I still held that love but rather Raven or rather Razzi did was beyond me. She doesn't remember any of the things we went through or what we told each other apparently the night our daughter was conceived and the cloak we found with blood was probably from a fight which no doubt is why she lost her memory.

"Beast boy." I heard Robins voice "Are you alright?"

I nodded and then walked off to my room where I locked myself in. I lay on my bed thinking back.

A night in a club, I was talking to a girl who was just blabbering on about something stupid, my eyes caught sight of Raven who was talking to some guy. I felt a ping in my heart at the smile on her face. Then I saw him touch her arm and her flinch, she walked away from him and he followed her. I saw the look on her face when he came close to her. I left the other girl and changed into a tiger jumping in front of her growling I jumped on him when he tried to touch her again. I knocked him unconscious with on hit by my paw.

I turned back to Raven, to find her sitting with her arms on her knee's and her head down I had never seen her like that before. I walked over and put my hand on her shoulder she looked up at me and then her head back down. I sat down and pulled her to me she put her head on my chest and cried. She got away from me and said a quite thank you before getting up and leaving. We went back to titans tower.

When we got there she went up to meditate on the roof, she's as powerful as she'll ever be I know that. Her eyes were closed and she was just hovering silently. I can remember the time cy and I accidently got into her mind and meet all of her personalities one of which called me her BB and said she liked me. Since then I watched her.

"Friend Beast boy. " Starfire's voice had broken my thoughts.

"Yes Starfire." I had asked

"You are well?" she asked me.

"Yes." I had answered before looking back to Raven.

Starfire had looked over to Raven then back to me then looked down to me.

"Her, tell." she had said before walking back inside to her soon to start party.

Needless to say I listened to what she said and told Raven later that night when we were both drunk and well you know what happened from there at least in my case any way. I wonder what Razzi would think if I showed her what all I can do. Maybe I'll show her sometime soon.

When the others called me for dinner Razzi was sitting in the living room watching a video of the first Christmas after Raven's disappearance . Her hair was pulled back in a poney tail and laying in her lap was our little girl who keep trying to get down.

I walked over and picked up the little girl and sat down next to Razzi who smiled at me, to my astonishment nothing broke. When I smiled back leighann crawled in between us and curled up in a ball. She acted just like a kitten.

"Come on you three it's time for dinner." Cy's voice came from the kitchen.

I smiled at her and took the little girl in to the kitchen and sat her in a high chair, then I pulled out her chair for her. She smiled in thanks. I sat down in my own chair and then looked at what was for dinner.

"Cy you know I don't eat meat!" I yelled at him.

"Well the rest of us do. Rather you want to eat meat or not is up to you but I think it is crazy not to." he yelled back.

Razzi laughed, Drawing all our atention.

"Do you always do that?" she asked us "Oh and Cy I'm not much of a meat eater either."

I looked at her surprised but Cy and the others gapped.

"Y-you don't eat meat?" Cy asked

"Not very often, and only chicken or fish when I do." she said.

"A girl after my own heart." I whispered but apparently not soft enough because she looked at me and smiled.

So Razzi and I ordered a vegetarian pizza from the pizza shop and ate in the kitchen while the others ate their beef and potatoes. I like potatoes but they were cooked in beef broth yuck. I guess maybe it goes back to the fact that I can change into those animals but I won't eat most meat. Leighann ate the potatoes but she didn't seem to like the beef that the others tried to get her to eat. She would through it back at Cy and laugh as he stared at her.

We left her in the care of the others and I took Razzi up to the roof where I jumped and turned in to a bird and flew back up to her. I landed on the roof and transformed into a kitten then rubbed up against her leg. I saw the blank look in her eyes before she screamed and then fainted.


	5. return of jinks

chapter 4. Return of Jinks

The next day.

Well it's been 24 hours since she passed out. I've been with her every minute, a few hours of that with our daughter in my arms. I love Leighann and I love Raven even if she wants to stay with the name Razzi it's what I know is on the inside that makes me love her, and thanks to the city we have the same last name. I wonder why they choose that name anyway.

Am I imagining it or did she just move? There it is again her leg moved.

"Razzi?" I said softly.

"BB?" she said as if everything was cloudy. "Where am I ?"

"Your in the medical wing." I answered picking our daughter up and placing her next to her mother.

Leighann snuggled up to her and I saw her open her eyes.

"Leighann." she said then looking at me she smiled. "I remember."

I smiled but I was in shock how could that have been all she needed to remember us. I called the others and watched as Cy checked everything out.

"She's alright but I know why we couldn't find her by her powers." he smiled "their dormant now."

I smiled at her and pulled her in to me, she put her hand on my chest and she kissed me before she picked up our daughter, then together we walked to the park. I guess we'll have to see how things change for here on out.

Cy. P.o.v.

I sat in the living room and read up on taking care of kids after the happy family had taken off , Robin had asked Star to go to the movies and I figured I'd stay here in case something happened. The fact is I'm thinking about how I'm going to tell Missy that I have a niece. She knows all about Raven but things are different now, before we thought that she was gone and we'd never see her again now she's here with a baby girl. Who happens to be beast boys child.

I was reading chapter 10 when my phone started ringing. It was a ring tone I missed hearing more. I picked up the phone and flipped it open.

"Hey Victor, it's been a while." her soft voice sounded in my ear.

" Hey Missy." I said as I flipped the page in the book.

"I was wondering if I could come over." she said

"I don't see why not, do you want me to come and get you?" I asked her.

"No, I want to walk." she said. "I'll be there soon. Love you."

"Love you too." I said just as I heard the door shut behind me. Turning around I saw a sight I'd never expected to see again.

Standing in the door way was a tall blond, her hair up in two poney tails her big pink eyes were sad and in her arms was an honorary Titan's communicator. Her face didn't fool me, she was trying to be strong but her hurt showed in the way she looked away from me and the way she didn't smile. I felt my heart fall to the ground. She had disappeared not long after Raven and I never thought I'd see her again either. I stood up and moved closer to her.

"Stay where you are." she said quietly and threw the communicator at me before she turned and fled.

"Wait, Jinks!" I screamed as I dropped the communicator and ran trying to catch up with her.

When I got to the outer door all I found was a note she had dropped, it had my name on it and on the back was a picture of a us when she had stilled had pink hair it was from the dance at Hive the time I had went undercover. It was then that I had crushed on her first and there that she had started to change. After a while she got tired of fighting for the evil side and she became an honorary Titan.

I walked back up to the living room and sat down before I opened the letter.

Dearest Victor Stone,

I had to leave you this letter. I love you with my whole heart which is why this is hard. I'm sick and I have about 6 months. The doctors have already tried everything they can think of. I've known for quite sometime that I was sick that's why I left and now with this told to you my darling, I'm going to leave the country and spend what's left of my days with my best friends. I hope you have found someone else to love in the past few years if you see me please don't follow me.

Yours lovingly,

Jinks.

I held a hand to my heart she couldn't be serous. But this was Jinks. If there was anything I know about her it's that even with all the bad things she's done she would never joke about dying. She was always afraid someone would die because of her or that she would die before she got the chance to have a family. We dated for a while and were still together when she disappeared I met Missy three months later and we stayed friends for a year while I waited to see if we made any progress finding either Raven or Jinks, Then after a year I finally stopped trying to avoid the fact that Jinks wasn't coming back.

The door opened and I didn't turn around I knew who it was. Missy, as much as I love her, she wasn't Jinks and would never hold me captive the same way that the beautiful girl with pink eyes could.

"Victor is everything okay." she asked placing a hand on my shoulder.

"We need to talk." I said turning to face her.

"Are you breaking up with me." she asked fighting tears.

"Listen Missy I love you, but I have to be honest I love someone else more and she's only got 6 months to live." I said "Maybe if I had never fallen for her we could be together now, but I did and I want to be there for her."

"Your' Jinks." she whispered as she hugged herself tight.

"Yes." I answered

"Go get her." she said whipping her tears away. "We can be friends."

"Yeah." I said as I walked to the computer room and she walked out.

I sat at the desk and typed in the names of her two best friends.

Mammoth and Gizmo they had been the other two in her group at the Hive and her best friends as well as her first real friends, In the outside world Jinks had never had any friends every one had been afraid of her because she brought bad luck hence the name. The search lead me to an island off of Ireland where the two of them had been living for the past two years and had also found themselves twin girls to whom they had gotten married.

Jinks was leaving on a jet from the airport to the small island to met her best friends. When they had found out about her changing sides and becoming a good guy they had both quite and left. The two of them had gone crazy when she told them about our relationship. The two of them decided they were going to leave, they didn't feel needed. Jinks had felt like her best friends had abandoned her. She took to hanging around with Raven and was devastated when she disappeared. She left two months later. She had kissed me and said she was going out to look for Raven and that was the last time I saw her.

I wrote a note for the others and took off heading to the airport to catch her before she got on that plane. I went as fast as I could go without getting pulled over or getting anyone hurt.


	6. Love, truth, and mortality

Chapter 5. Love, truth, and mortality

Raven's P.O.V.

We walked back into the tower to find it deserted. We knew that Star and Robin had gone out to the movies but we had no idea where Cyborg had gone to. We took our daughter to the room we now shared and lay her in her crib as she had fallen asleep sometime on the way from the park. Then we headed down to the living room.

Walking in I noticed something was a miss laying on the table where Cy had been when we left was a note.

"Gar." I called out causing Beast boy to look at me funny as he came over to stand next to me.

"It's a note from Cy."

He took the note from me and read it aloud.

"I have gone to stop Jinks, don't come after me, I must do this on my own. Your friend Victor." His green eyes shone. "He found her?"

"No she found him ." I said "Look." I held up the envelope with Jinks writing on the front which said Victor.

We put the letter back down and left the room walking back to our own room once again.

"You think we should tell the others ?" Beast boy asks me.

"No." I say "he doesn't want them to come after him and you know Star and Robin."

"You called me Gar." he said looking in my eyes.

"Yes." I said "I thought it would be ok since it is your name."

"Can I call you by your real name?" he asked

"You mean Rachael?"I asked smiling

"Yeah." he said

"Yes."I answered as he pulled me to him and ran his long green fingers through my hair, before tipping my head back and kissing me.

He ran his tongue across my bottom lip as if seeking entrance and I opened my mouth. Our tongues danced as we slowly kissed. I couldn't get over how much had changed now that I knew who I was and were I came form. I was Rachael Roth a.k.a. Raven the missing teen titan and my daughter's father was Garfield Logan a.k.a Beast boy. I had a family here all be it not a conventional family it was still my family. Vic, Rich, and Star we're three of the only people I had ever trusted in my life. Gar and my ex-boss being the other two. I can't say I remember trusting anyone else in my life and I'm glad that these people were the once I trusted.

Later we lay in the room, watching Leighann breath as she slept and I thought how lucky I was to have found myself. This place was wonderful, my friends were here, the boy I thought of as my brother was finding his love, and finally Star and Rich were together. Realizing that I hadn't remembered any of them for 3 years made me think about how much I missed. I wasn't here when Jinks ran away, I wasn't here to see Star and Rich actually become a couple. I had missed a lot more then I liked. And Leighann's father had missed seeing her first step, hearing her first word. I look over at Gar and find him asleep, I laugh to myself slightly, like father like daughter I thought. She looked like him, her hair with green tips and her eyes bright shining green like his but with flecks of purple and blood red in them. She had gotten my skin though the grey almost otherworldly skin that I had thanks to my father. I regret that she'll never know any of her grandparents, my mom being dead since I was young and Gar's since he was.

Watching the two of them I knew that finally things were as they were supossed to be. I pulled my robe over to me and slipped it on tying it as I stood up. I walked out of the room and headed for the kitchen, entering the room I stopped dead in my tracks. Looking at the picture in front of me I wanted to cry, Jinks and Cy stood there together holding each other and in their arms was a cute little boy. His dark skin and pink hair a dead give away as to who he was. Cy was whispering something to her as they held the boy. I went to turn around when I heard..

"Hey Raven." Cy's voice was happy and tired.

I turned around to see him smiling at me and Jinks staring.

"Raven.." she said taking the boy in her arms. She walked toward me with him in her arms.

"Jinks." I said looking at her, she hadn't changed much she had however dyed her hair since I last saw her she stood before me not as a pink haired girl but a blonde.

"This is Anthony." she said handing me the little boy, who I took and smiled at.

"He's two." she said as I held him "It's a shame I won't be around to see him grow up."

I looked up at her and the smile I'd had before disappeared as she gave me a sad one of her own.

"What's wrong?" I asked

"They couldn't name it, but they tried everything they could think of after I had him." she looked at her little boy small tears escaping her eyes.

"He sure is cute." I said with a smile before I heard the cry's. I smiled at her and handed him back saying. "I gotta go get my little one."

Cy chuckled at the look on her face as I left the room. I was right outside the door when the crying stopped, I opened the door and saw Gar sitting on the bed holding her in his arms and lightly singing to her. I smiled and walked in.

"I think she needs a friend." I whispered taking her into my arms and motioning for Gar to follow me, then headed back to the main room which was connected to the kitchen. We entered the room just as Cy placed the little boy down on the floor.

"BB." Jinks said looking at him before her eyes landed on Leighann in my arms. She walked over and smiled at me.

"This is Leighann she's mine and Gar's she's two as well." I tell her sitting her down next to Anthony.

The two of them looked at each other before they began to play, I laughed as Leighann turned herself into the kitten and curled up next to him as he lay his head down on the floor.

"Where were you Raven they looked for you, we all did." Jinks said as I tuned back into what was going on.

"Memory loss, I was living in town as Razzi Logan working at a store." I tell her.

"So how did they find you?" she asked

"We walked in and Star here almost hugged her to death." Came the reply as two more people joined our group. "It's nice to see you again Jinks." Robin/Rich said

"You too." she smiled at them as Star walked over to were the kids lay Leighann now back in her human form.

"There are two babies now?" she asked confused causing him to look at her, then down at the floor.

"Who's the Baby boy?" he asked causing Jinks , me and the guys to start laughing.

"He is Anthony." Jinks said "My son." she smiled at Cy. Both he and Gar caught that and it hit them the same way it had hit me. This baby boy was Cy's son.

"So he is yours and..." they both trailed off making both of us laugh.

"Honestly you two act like it didn't surprise you when you found out Leighann was BB's." Cy said as he picked up his son.

"When Victor found me again ,after I left here I told him about Anthony and we both decided that they needed to get to know each other. This way it won't be as hard for either of them when it's just the two of them." Her smile gone again she hugged both of them tight.

Star was the next one to talk and what she said made us all burst out laughing.

"I want a baby too."

The only one that didn't laugh was Rich who blushed crimson instead and said they'd talked about it later.

With everything said and everyone informed on Jinks condition we all went to bed, Us taking Leighann to our room and Cy taking his family to his. It seems weird to say his family but that's what they are. I wonder if he plans to try to save her? Knowing him the way I do I'm sure he does but I don't want to say anything to anyone about it. I lay down next to Gar and lay my head against his chest as he breaths slowly floating off to sleep myself.

The next morning when we entered the main room we found Cy and Jinks talking about a wedding. I smiled at Gar who had asked me on our picnic to become his wife. I was never this happy before, I never could be. I thank god for the fact that my powers are dormant right now, because it means I can express myself. We walk over to them and I smile before sitting down next to Jinks and whispering in her ear. She squeals and Vic looks at us like we're crazy before I smile and say.

"So is there any way we can make this a double?"

He looked between me and Gar before he pulled Gar in and gave him noggie. I laughed as he hugged me tightly.

So for a few hours we sat and talked about plans and we all decided that instead of wearing white as traditional brides did we would wear the color of our children's birth stones. For me that meant sapphire blue and for her it meant a beautiful ruby red. The guys would wear tuxes and the kids would be dressed as the ring bearer (Anthony) and the flower girl (Leighann). We were getting our breakfast when the door opened again and in walked Star and Robin, both looking annoyed and tired.

"Bad night?" I asked looking between them.

"Don't ask." he said

"He refuses to have a baby." she said sadly "I thought that having a baby meant we cared for each other."

I smiled at Star she was so innocent at heart. "It means a lot more then that Star and it's a lot of work, these two got off easy coming into their kids lives when they were two, meaning not so many dirty diapers left to change, not to many bottles left to make..." I sighed as I looked at Gar.

Gar looked at her and smiled "Hey I'm trying here." he said

Cy looked back at the two girls and smiled "Let me just say we didn't choose not to be there."

"You both disappeared."

Raven turned around and shot him a glare. "I didn't disappear with the knowledge of my child or who anyone of you was."

"We know that." they said before the boys all walked off headed toward the kitchen.

"I may have left but I didn't know about him either, and I thought leaving would be better for everyone after I found out." she said

"I know." Raven said.

"Why does he not want a baby." Star asked sighing.

"He's just not ready, Star." the two other girls say.

The girls sat down on the couch and then talked about everything that went along with their lives. Raven and Jinks would laugh every now and then at a secret joke. Star would give them looks like what's so funny?

The boys sitting in the kitchen we're talking too.

"Come on Robin tell us what's bugging you." Gar said

"It's just Star." he said "All she kept talking about was a baby all night long and she wouldn't let me get to sleep."

"So she wouldn't stop talking about a baby huh." Cy said

"Yeah she really wants a baby." Robin said

"Well I guess that makes since I mean she's surrounded by babies Rob." Cy replied.

"Yeah." he answered.

"I don't care if she comes back in the room and starts bugging me about it again, I'm going to bed." He got up shaking his head.

"We'll talk to you later." They said.

"Later." he called walking out.

The girls continued to talk and Star played with the kids once they woke up.

Anthony's pink hair falling into his eyes as he wiggled around in Stars arms an she blew on his stomach, making him laugh. Leighann with her purple and green hair falling into her eyes stood up and reached out for Jinks. Jinks smiled and picked the little girl up smiling. I couldn't stop thinking about how much had changed in 3 years.

"You know Star, there's something we both need to ask you." I say to Star as Jinks looks up at me.

"Yes." she said as Star looked back at us from her place on the floor.

"We were wondering how you felt about being a maid of honor." We both said.

"Huh?" she asked slightly confused.

"The guys asked us to marry them." We told her "We said yes."

"Of crouse." she said looking at them.

Starfire's P.O.V

After talking with friends Raven and Jinks I can't help but wonder why Robin and I are so far behind. I guess I just feel bad because he'll never want to have a baby with me. I guess the difference is unlike friends Raven and Jinks I have no human DNA. Raven's mother was human and Jinks parents were both human. I realize that they don't see their parents, but they had them somewhat during their childhood.

Raven's mother died when she was young and her father well the less said the better. Jinks I know nothing about them other than that they are human and left her at the hive when she was young.

Sitting on the roof I stare off into the stars silently wishing. I wished that things were different and that I could return home and be with the man who was with me during my childhood. I wished I could feel loving arms around me. I wished my sister had not gotten sent back to jail. Closing my eyes I smile at the sound of the animals and the wind. When I opened my eyes again I saw Robin sitting next to me. I had a sudden flash back to the day my sister had been taken back to jail. The day I had feared the end of my friendship with all of them.

"Are you okay, Starfire?" He asked looking at me.

"Am fine." I say staring back out at the night sky.

"You know I never thought I'd say this but your lying" he said causing me to look at him, he had a sad smile on his face and his hands were sitting on either side of him. "My time with Bruce taught me to tell when people were lying to me."

"Matters why?" I asked simply looking at him.

"It matters because I don't like being lied to." he said "Especially by someone I care for."

"Care for?" I asked him looking away.

"Yes Star." He said "I'm not ready for a baby, I admit that but it doesn't mean that I don't care."

"Boys tell you?" I asked

"Tell me what?" He asked looking at me I smiled and laughed.

"Married they are getting." I said.

"What!" he all but screamed.

"Friends Raven and Jinks asked me to be maid of honor." I smiled into space.

"Wow." he said looking out into space as well.

"Love me you do?" I asked looking back at him with tears running down my face.

"Of course I love you Star, I'm just not ready." He said

"Why?" I asked

"It means a lot to me that I do things right and not too fast." he tells me.

I sigh and stand up my long hair falling around my shoulders, I look down at Robin and wonder what he would think if I left. I take off flying in the air with my arms at my sides. A part of me thinks I should go back to Tamarran. After a short flight around the city I landed on the roof again and stared up at the stars.

"Star?" I turned around and found Raven looking at me.

"Hello friend Raven." I said.

"Are you alright." she asks me coming closer. "You don't look like it."

"I want to go home." I tell her. "I no longer feel at home here."

"But Star we want you here, we would miss you if you were to leave." she said

"I'm leaving. I must get ready now." I said running back to my room to get my stuff. My eyes started to tear up and run over. I flung myself into my room and pulled my stuff into a bag that I tied up and then I flung myself onto my bed crying.

"She's what!" Robin screamed

"That's what she said" Raven repeated looking from one titan to another.

"Why?" Cy asked

"She said she doesn't feel at home here anymore." Was the answer.

Robin paced for a few minutes before he stormed out of the room and toward Starfire's room. He opened the door to find it completely empty except for a note lying on the bed.

Dear Robin,

I'm sorry I have to leave. This is no longer my home I wish I was able to explain it better. I do not think I could. I miss my home and the people I love there. I love you but I can never give you what friends Raven and Jinks have given to Cy and BB. I understand that love has many different definitions. My mind is a muddle right now. Hopefully I will see you again one day. Starfire

Robin ran up to the roof and looked all over the sky. The stars around the tower were shining but there was no sign of Starfire any where. He let tears fall down his cheeks as he stared at the night sky. A low whisper left his lips of one word. "Sorry"before he screamed into the wind. "I'm sorry! Starfire Please come back!" and he fell to the roof.

" Robin." she whispered as she flew toward Tamarran. She stopped and turned back to look at the planet earth a sigh coming out of her mouth she flew back toward the planet. Just as she entered the sky around the tower she heard him scream for her, her heart broke in two at that moment. She flew down to the roof top and landed without a sound. She stared at the boy she had grown to love, his hair hanging into his face and his mask coving his eyes. She knew then the truth. She couldn't be happy without him in her life.

"Robin." she whispered walking up to him and placing one hand on his shoulder. He looked up and she fell to her knees with him hugging him close as she whispered I love you. Hours later they sat on the couch and watched T.V. while the others took the kids to the park. Leighann and Anthony were inseparable now that they had gotten to know each other. Star leaned into Robins' embrace and together they fell asleep.


End file.
